Thursday, February 7, 2013

On the Up.

I've written this post so many times and deleted it just as many. I'm still finding the borders of how much I want to share here. Let's just say that there has been a great deal of mental and emotional turmoil in my head lately. The stress of that has caused all manner of physical problems, not the least of which is how I've been handling interactions with my kids.

Today at lunch I was talking with B and everything just clicked into place in my head. There have been times I've found peace these last few weeks, the moments when I don't feel overwhelmed and they all have something in common. I think I need to be following my passion. As an amazing woman wrote about recently, I've been letting my fear direct me, prevent me, control me.

I find my center when I'm reading about homesteading. I read things like Made From Scratch, Storey's Guide to Raising Sheep, From Scratch, and a slew of blogs. My heart sings when I read about families and their gardens and animals.

So what's the problem? I don't live on acreage with skills and knowledge and friends and.. right. See, I let myself become bitter. I told myself that I couldn't have the life I want just because it wasn't being handed to me. Yes, I'm a thirty-two year old who occasionally thinks like a spoiled child.

Where am I going with this? B and I talked at lunch. I've (we've?) decided that this year, I will have chickens. Come hell or high water, as they say. Or maybe Guineas. But birds, dammit.

This leaves me with challenges to overcome. I need to make money to pay for birds, their food, their housing. I need to clean up the backyard. I need to read and research. We have no tools to speak of, no woodworking experience, no farm experience, no animal care beyond cats and a dog. Any tips, ideas, suggestions will be heartily appreciated. I'll be churning out some assorted gnomes (really the only thing to sell in my sad little Etsy shop) to help raise money.

For those of you that have sloughed through this dull-to-everyone-but-me post, here are pictures of random things from the past week.

(these are sunflowers. Microgreens here we come!)


  1. Oh my dear friend, I am sending you the biggest hug. My head is starting to pound and my fever is spiking, but as soon as I feel better I will send you a nice long email concerning this post.
    PS- the top photo melts my heart!

  2. It was NOT a dull post;it was a "take charge" post! Birds, dammit - that's the spirit. I'm not saying this lightly, I quite mean it. I have no words of wisdom, I'm sorry to say, but I can offer this - we had a dismal lack of know-how when we got our chickens. Same with our horses. Or, before that, the cattle. We just learned as we went. Well, we did research how to get them set up, and matters of basic care, which it sounds like you already have a start on. That's just being sensible and responsible. But don't overthink it.

    This is exciting!!!! You are gonna LOVE having birds!

  3. I go through the same thing ALL the time! I've been trying to embrace urban farming, as moving away from the city is not an option for us right now. I've got a pretty good garden going and I've started a worm bin. I plan to get chickens in a few years (been wanting them for about 15 years). Love that hat!

  4. how exciting for you! it's wonderful that you have been able to identify how you were truly feeling and have found a step in the right direction for yourself. sending you big hugs x x x x

  5. I know nothing about chickens but I will be your chicken cheerleader! Share your journey because I will find it interesting :)

  6. I thought I was the only one pouting because I don't have a farm! We do have chickens, angora rabbits & a small garden, but that's really all we can do until we're able to move to a place with some land (our lil city house is super under water right now). So, offering commiseration...I hear ya. Chickens are a piece of cake, if that helps. Way easier than a cat or a dog in my opinion. Let me know if you have any questions about starting out with chickens.
    Amanda -

  7. yay! i'm right there with you and would love chickens too but $$ and timing aren't right (*cough* again). i find your determination inspiring!