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Friday, October 17, 2014

Thinking

(Old pictures that have nothing to do with this post.. except for when they do.)



It's occurred to me that I may be having a not-mid-life crisis. I feel directionless and adrift. All those existential questions that I don't have answers for plague me. What is my purpose? If there were some moment at the end of one's life where they could look back over the whole of their existence.. what would I see? What do I want to see?

I don't even know.



The dreams that I've had for years.. are they really just dreams? What if I'm "not cut out" for them? What if they really wouldn't make me happy? What does that say about me? About my future? About direction?



I'm talking with a good friend of mine (typing. But still.) and it's.. eye opening. And daunting. I know that I'm negative and pessimistic. I make excuses and avoid things that are too hard. I'm short tempered and have been known to hold a grudge. I can recall, with accuracy, insignificant-but-definitely-negative things that happened more than twenty years ago. I am not patient. I'm not proud of any of those things.



So how do I change those things? Obviously I can't just change them all at once. And certainly not over night. It'll be hard work (which is a problem due to my habitual avoidance of hard work). But where do I start? My friend suggests that I think about how I want to feel and how to accomplish that. Sounds easy enough, right? But it's not. Still.. I guess that life - living - is.. sort of a work is progress.



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Completely unrelated: there's still time to donate to the Children's Miracle Network through Extra Life.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Yarn Along, Extra Life, Here Again

I really had planned on posting at least once a week. Honestly. Let's see if I do any better this time?

School has officially started for the Elf and Imp. The Beast has, thus far, declined all invitations to join us. I think he enjoys having time to himself with no competition for toys.

It's October again. And that means that it's time for Extra Life. I'd be honored if anyone wanted to donate. Last year it was just a friend and myself. I'm not very social and therefore find it difficult to spread the word. At any rate, on October 25th (and the 26th) I pledge to play at least 24 hours of games (video, card, tabletop, what-have-you). Provided I can manage to reconfigure the software I will likely stream the video games on my Twitch channel. Likely I'll play Archeage (it's my escape of choice these days). Maybe a little Knights of Pen and Paper, Cthulhu Saves the World, or maybe even the Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade game from the early 90's. Oh! And Gold Rush (a recent Steam/Humble Bundle purchase - my sister and I played it when we were young).

So yes. Donate money to help save kids. It's the right thing to do.

And now, the Yarn Along (a day late).

In the past few days I've picked up knitting from a year ago and also dusted off (okay, I left the dust on) my spinning wheel for the first time in about a year. Yeah. I haven't done anything fiber related in a long time. I'm back to working on Flaming June. I'm knitting it entirely from Phat Fiber spinning samples. It's very colorful. As far as reading, I've been rereading the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon. Because. Yeah. Outlander. I'm on Drums of Autumn and love it just as much as I did the first time I read it.

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Here

Breaking my long internet silence (anyone still out there?), looking for advice. I'm trying to come up with a reading list for a soon-to-be twelve year old. The internet is a wide and varied place and I'm having a hard time reconciling things like Twilight being on many of the lists I'm finding.

The life update: Everyone is fine. We're all still here and kicking. This fall I'm going to start officially homeschooling the Imp and Beast. Add to that the Elf's preteen hormonal.. baggage. Life has been... busy.

I'm here, I read blogs, I escape into video games to retain sanity. Not a great deal of crafting has been happening and I've been terrible about keeping in touch with people. I'm afraid that's just going to be the nature of things until I find some footing in the rocky adventure of parenting.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Knitting again.


I've been knitting this headwrap for a dear friend's birthday. I was worried that it was going to be delivered late (due to my starting it late) but now I'm positive. I have to rip the whole thing out and start again. It's too big. I'm knitting the smallest size on needles several sizes smaller than recommended and it's still too big. Ugh. I think I remember now why I stopped knitting for so long.

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Crazy weather

Ice, sleet, and snow have been forecast for tonight and tomorrow. No big deal, right? This is a common winter thing, yes? Not in North Florida. I was wearing a tank top comfortably yesterday. Now there is (literally) freezing cold rain outside. FSU is closed until at least noon. It feels like the entire world has been turned upside down.

We snagged two less-feral-than-they-used-to-be kittens from outside and stuck them in the back room for the night. None of us could bear the idea of them being out in this weather.

Tonight is a night for wool socks and feather blankets.

Monday, January 27, 2014

Birthday fun

I'll post later about the amazing gifts a dear friend sent. For now I'll say that I have been treated quite well already today. Breakfast from Panera, gifts from a friend, birthday wishes from around the world.

And now.. I'll be spending the majority of my day doing this. Because I can.

Friday, January 24, 2014

Fuzzballs

Something happened to my back and I've been in excruciating pain for many days now. It's insane and nothing helps. Supporting my lower back with a pillow when I sit in chairs eases the pain a little. Because of that, B bought me a (rather expensive in my opinion) new chair for my birthday. When I'm using the computer I usually sit in a wooden kitchen chair, this one is a definite improvement.

I meant to post at least once a week but pain has a way of derailing plans. Better late than never, right? For better or worse, I mostly took pictures of some of our cats.


Three boys plus perler beads equals total happiness (or fighting over colors. It's a toss up).


My new chair, complete with Beast.


Eddy. His thirteenth birthday was on the 17th - ten days before mine. He's the only cat we have with a known birthday.


Erasmus James Flattery. Better known as Ras. This picture sums up how weird she is. Perching on small electronics? Totally normal.. right?


Pilot looking like a bobble head. The box my chair came in is wildly popular among all the critters.



Ramses. My old man. He's cross eyed, nearly toothless, and the sweetest cat I've ever known.


Faustus (though we just call him Faust) with a side of Pilot, Surreal, and Calcifer.


Ishtar. Neurotic and beautiful. Because cats are all weird in their own ways.

That's it. Beyond moaning in pain I've been reading books, carding fiber, and milking this "it's almost my birthday" thing for all it's worth (this mostly amounts to having extra coffee). Happy Friday!